Finding Myself

Two years of a pandemic certainly gives you time. Now, what you do with that time is the challenge. At times, I felt like the world was standing still. It was a feeling I had never experienced before. What was I going to do being “stuck” at home? I could only re arrange the house so much, watch so much television, cooking and baking were not my thing, so I sat. I couldn’t even bring myself to write anything. I was just feeling lost in this new space. I worked, spend quality time with my kids and at times friends, and tried to see family when acceptable. As much as I was enjoying the new way of living, I started to meditate, something I never really did prior to any of this. I really focused on where I had been, where I was at and where I wanted to be. It is not that I was actually lost, but I was getting to know who I was, who I had been and who I wanted to be. I was finding, me, my voice in this very still and quiet space. Everything I thought I knew, or even wanted, seemed like it was someone else’s life. Realizing how truly happy and blessed I really was with what I had, and where I was, I found that I was exactly where I needed and wanted to be. I was content. I always challenge myself to learn and grow, but the wants, the needs, well, there weren’t any. There was nothing I could want or need that would make me happy. I found that I was happy with me. Of course life has been a challenge, personally, professionally, emotionally, but that is just part of living, of the journey. Where I find myself today, is exactly where I am meant to be.

Advertisement